When to do it/When not to

One of the best pieces of advice I’ve read about story writing is to show emotion rather than simply stating it, with regard to your character.

I started trying to show everything. I originally thought it would give such depth and really draw in the reader. The problem was that the writing became so overly descriptive and fluffy, I lost sight of what I wanted to convey. I just tried to paint a picture of everything.

There needs to be a balance between showing and telling. That’s what this post is about, finding the balance between the two.

Show Emotions ~ Tell Transitions

You should tell, not show, when non-emotionally charged information needs to be told, and also during transitions, which I’ll explain shortly, after I give you examples of showing.

Knowing when to show emotions can be tricky. You don’t want to overdo it. Many articles I’ve read have told me to show, but didn’t give me any examples. I learn much better when I can see examples of what I’m being taught.

I’m going to give you commonly used emotional words and some examples of what you can say instead of using them. By seeing my examples, it may help you to write some fantastic emotional descriptions of your own. I’ll also give a little information on when you shouldn’t show, but tell, to avoid over-description.

Examples of How to Show

Telling readers that characters are tired, scared, happy, sad, is considered lazy writing. Let your writers feel the emotion. Consider these examples:

Show being Embarrassed by:

• blushing cheeks
• racing heart
• wanting to run away
• butterflies in the stomach
• averting the eyes

Worried:

• pacing back and forth
• sweaty palms
• can’t sleep
• can’t sit still
• can’t focus
• racing thoughts

Shy:

• looking at the ground
• speaking quietly
• fidgeting
• speaking with eyes down
• avoiding eye contact

Angry:

• pursed lips
• pounding fists on table
• bright red face
• yelling
• gritting teeth
• hands held in fists

I hope this gets your mind thinking of ways to paint a picture of what your characters are experiencing. Take these ideas and use them all you’d like.

I encourage you to use that incredibly creative mind and show your readers what you’re trying to say, coming up with wonderful descriptions of your own.

When to Tell

It’s a good idea to tell rather than show in areas of your story that require the use of an emotional word, but the word isn’t emotionally charged, and also during transitions.

For example, when you’re writing simple backstory, expressing a simple statement, or when you’ve used a fair amount of “showing” paragraphs.

If you’re saying, “John could see how angry Mary was at Joe,” you would use the word angry there. There’s no emotional charge. It’s just a sentence. Telling is enough.

During Transitions: For a transition from one place to another or from one chapter to another, telling is the most appropriate.

No one wants to read a play-by-play of a character walking to their car, then driving to the store with emotionally “showing” everything they do…. “The creak of the car door took Sue’s attention from her focus on the chirping birds in the nearby trees, where they sat singing among rustling leaves….” Good grief, get to the point already! See how over the top it can be to show everything?

Practice showing emotion in your writing. It really brings the story to life. But… make sure you think about when to use it to heighten your story and not just to jam it full of fluff.

Feel free to leave me a comment about your own experience with show vs. tell.

Happy Writing!

[ctct form=”387″ show_title=”false”]